Counselling
What can I expect in counselling?
You are the one who keeps the peace. The one who holds it all together, even when you’re feeling a little broken inside. You have read the books, listened to the podcasts, watched a ton of videos, finding ways to be nicer, calmer and more understanding and thinking that if you can just be better, things will feel better. You have so much knowledge under that hat about everything you could do, but you avoid those uncomfortable feelings by making sure you do everything in your power to make the other person happy. You don’t want to upset the other person because it will leave you feeling not likeable and not worthy, and you don’t want to feel like that.
Counselling is a space where you can breathe.
A space where someone finally asks how you are, and means it. It’s a place where you don’t have to pretend. Where you don’t have to hold it all together. Where you can say the quiet things you’ve kept inside. The thoughts you’re scared to admit. The parts of you that feel tired, unseen, or unsure.
You might not know what you need yet. That’s ok too.
Counselling helps you find that. Bit by bit. Learning how to listen to that quiet voice inside you. The one that says, “I don’t want to feel like this anymore.”
It will be our highest honour to be able to show you how to put healthy boundaries in place with loved ones, without all the worry, guilt and fear that usually comes with it. And the feelings that follow when you do stand for yourself, we will work through them together, so that you’re protected, and you’re armed, and you’re guarded. So that when you do assert yourself, when you do say the thing that you want to say, and that other person does get upset and offended, and they go to push your buttons, and they know what buttons to push, it going to hold a whole lot less power over you.
We’re going to fill you up with, strategies that you can practice before you start, things like saying your piece, and we’ll practice them together. Until you feel confident enough to use them. And only then, once that confidence has developed, will we support you to then go and say, and do, and be, and have the things you want to say, do, be, and have.
When we work together, it is all about you and finding ways to support you towards the life you want for yourself.
How do I know that counselling is right for me?
It’s kind of like trying on a new dress.
You’ve worn the same old one for years, it doesn’t quite fit, but you’ve gotten used to it. You tug at it, adjust it, tell yourself maybe if I just shift a little or stand a certain way, it’ll look better. But deep down, it’s uncomfortable. It’s tight in all the wrong places. It’s just not you anymore.
Counselling is like walking into a quiet little shop where, for once, someone gently says, let’s find you something that fits the new style you didn’t know you had. You don’t have to change who you are to fit the dress. You get to find what feels right on you, find your comfortable, like you can finally breathe again.
And maybe for the first time in a long time… you get to feel seen.
Our approach to counselling
When you’ve been hurt, especially when you were little or in close relationships and it can make trusting people feel really hard. You might have learned to keep the peace, say “yes” when you wanted to say “no,” or go quiet when things got too big. You probably try really hard to be perfect so no one gets upset. Maybe you pull away from people, even when part of you wants to be close.
Sometimes your feelings feel too big to handle. Other times, you wonder if you even feel anything at all. You more than likely even catch yourself talking to yourself in a way you’d never speak to someone you love. For us, it all starts with connection. How we show up for you, how we listen, how we sit in it with you, that’s the most important part. When you feel safe with someone, it gets a little easier to look at the things you’ve been carrying.
We often work with people who are deeply self-aware and who understand their patterns and can speak about their experiences. But still feel stuck, repeating the same situations or not moving in the way they hoped.
We don’t just talk about what’s in your head
We also listen to what your body is saying. Sometimes, your mind tries to move on, but your body still feels stuck. Maybe you get tight in your chest, feel sick in your stomach, or shut down without knowing why. That’s not you being dramatic or broken, it’s your body remembering things, even if you don’t have all the words.
If that sounds weird, that is perfectly ok. We have worked with many clients who have used that word, but in a good way. Because it is a weirdness that works and supports you in a way that feels kind of very cool.
We can chat more about this and click her to arrange a time to chat.
